Good Night
by SincerelyRainbow
Summary: Zero's Requiem is reaching its final stage, and all Suzaku really wants is to hold Lelouch, lips pressing gently against one another's, one last time. But fate doesn't seem to be on their side. SuzaLulu/T/BoyLove/R


**AUTHOR NOTES!  
TITLE: **Good Night (Good Knight, if you want to go for a pun. XD)  
**RATING: **T for mild language, implied boyxboy relations, and death.  
**GENRE: **Angst/Romance  
**PAIRING: **Suzaku x Lelouch  
**NOTES: **Uhm, so this is my first time writing anything for Code Geass. I rarely write in first person. So this is probably really sketchy as it is. I apologize if Suzaku is a bit OOC. I hope you enjoy all the same. And let's not start the whole HE'S DEAD-HE'S ALIVE debate here. From Suzaku's point of view, he's dead. I thought of part of this at work. But it's mostly inspired by this really cool RP I'm in. c: I love my CG people. x3 ENJOY THE STORY!

* * *

"_Suzaku, you will become a hero." I never wanted to be a hero. I just wanted a place for our relationship to grow…_

"_You will become Zero, savior of the world who rescued everyone from the enemy of the world, Lelouch Vi Britannia." But Zero was your role, all of this was your doing. Not mine. I don't deserve to become Zero. Because what if this whole thing was my fault in the first place? What if I hadn't killed my father? Would things have been different for me? For Japan? For us?_

I guess it doesn't matter now because I promised you I'd go through with this. And after everything, I just can't find it in me to break a promise to you. Even though there's a part of me that's screaming for me to stop. _Don't kill your best friend! _It's yelling at me, Lelouch. What do I do?

But I can't stop now. It'd ruin the plan, Zero's Requiem. The plan to bring about world peace, the gentler world that you promised Nunnally she'd have when she opened her eyes. And even if there wasn't this plan, I couldn't stop now. The sword's already made its path. The hilt is almost to your abdomen. What have I done? Did I really just kill. . .my best friend? My . . .lover?

Don't make that agonized face. Please, Lelouch. Lelouch, your name is the only thing I can manage to mutter out! There's tears rolling down my face. I wish this was all over. I wish we could rewind time, back to where things weren't like this. No, I want to rewrite time. . .You're talking again though, even with the sword running through you, and the blood soaking your clothing.

"This is a punishment for you…" I don't care.

I wonder if you can feel my body shaking when you put your head on my shoulder. I wonder if you can feel my body tensing, trying so hard not to pull you into my arms…Because damnit, Lelouch, you're shaking. You're dying! And there's nothing I can do but stand here. Fuck, why am I just standing here?

"You will be the defender of justice, and wear a mask forever." I don't care about wearing the mask. And I hope I don't let you down in the end…

Your hand extends towards my, no your, mask, fingers bloodied. I can't help but remember a time when it was your hand, pale and soft against my cheek, pulling me closer. "You will no longer be able to live as Suzaku Kururugi." That's alright with me. There is no Suzaku Kururugi without Lelouch Vi Brittania anyway.

"You will sacrifice your happiness for the world eternally." It doesn't matter. My happiness was gone minutes ago when I realized that you were dying.

"I accept that Geass." It's the only thing I can make my mouth say. Not the words I want to whisper to you. Not I love you. Only acceptance.

With hands shaking, I manage to remove the sword, wet eyes watching as we pull away from one another for the final time. There's so much blood soaking through now, and it's hard to watch. Even harder knowing that I'm the one who caused it. That all of this is my fault…

I stand as though stuck to the floor watching helplessly as you fall down the ramp in an unceremonious manner. It takes every will I have not to slide down and pull you into my arms. Because that's not what Zero would do, right? If I did that, all of your hard work, your entire plan, your death would be in vain. But it hurts to just watch, so I close my eyes.

I hear Nunnally crying now. She's screaming, Lelouch! Why won't you wake up? Make her stop crying. Please. But the rest of the world is cheering. It's like you planned, right? So why is this still so hard? Why, even though I know everything will be peaceful now, is it I can't stop these tears? Why is everybody cheering while you're laying there dying? I just wish they'd all shut up. They don't realize how much they should be thanking you for the peace they're celebrating. . .

And now it's nighttime. Nunnally hasn't spoken to me yet. It's still too soon, though I think she understands. But that aside, it's cold tonight. The wind keeps blowing my window open, and I swear I can hear your voice. Though it's probably my imagination, telling me _I love you_ in that haunting voice that seemed to blow in from the cold night air.

Love you too, Lelouch. Good night, sweet Prince.


End file.
